The Tater Tot Recruiter

"You're not a real recruiter until you have an ulcer. Talk to me then."
(My first boss in recruiting)

Last week, I talked about the strange array of ingredients that make up a successful senior recruiter. Those ingredients included a hefty dose of People Pleaser, a dash of Insanity, some Stubbornness, and some other stuff. It was, quite possibly, the most interesting blog post ever written. But even more interesting than these common ingredients are the uncommon ones.

Move over, hamster surgeons. I really believe that recruiting is the most interesting profession on the planet. I cannot think of any other job where your own individual style matters more in creating your success. Every great recruiter recruits differently – we put our own flavor in everything we do, no matter how many scripts you try to make us stick to.

Some recruiting personas are fast and fried. I call those Tater Tot Recruiters. Other recruiting personas are baked, take time, and remind you of Mom. I call those Meat Loaf Recruiters. Some require precise ingredients, meticulous measurement, and perfect execution. I call them Soufflé Recruiters. And some are hyper careful. I call those Egg White Omelettes, No Cheese, No Bacon, No Sour Cream, No Oil, Parsley on the Side Recruiters.

Below is a brief description of each.

Tater Tots: Quick, Quick, Quick. They ask 10 questions for every candidate. The same 10 questions. No nonsense. Time it takes to submit a candidate: 6 minutes. Pros: Fast. They can fill a role faster than anyone else. Cons: They forget you the next morning.

Meat Loaf Recruiters: The hovering, "helicopter mom". They ask questions about candidate's lives. They over prepare candidates for interviews, telling them where to park, what to wear, and where they can pee before their interview. Time it takes to submit a candidate: 2 hours. Pros: Most candidates love them. Cons: They fret more than their candidates do.

Soufflé Recruiters: They seek the holy grail of candidates. They look for the absolutely perfect technical candidate, down to the version of Visual Studio. The candidate's not perfect? They won't even call them. Time it takes to submit a candidate: 3 weeks. Pros: It's a damn good candidate. Cons: the role is filled before they submit them.

Egg White Omelet, No Cheese, No Bacon, No Sour Cream, No Oil, Parsley on the Side Recruiters: They have an SPHR and ask careful, lawsuit-proof questions.
Time it takes to submit: 6 hours. Pros: Very, very, very safe. Cons: Not too efficient and somewhat forgettable.

ALL of these recruiters are valuable. All are doomed to get ulcers - that's just the nature of the business.

I happen to love all four. Certain roles will be filled faster and served better by a Tater Tot than a Meat Loaf. Certain candidates will respond better to an Egg White Omelet than a Soufflé. In fact, I would argue, the best recruiting team on the planet would have a blend of each.

Can you imagine if a team had a few of each food, and each candidate could be matched, according to 29 aspects of compatibility (thanks, eHarmony), with a recruiter they would be happiest with? Hmm… maybe I've invented the newest Idea Entity service offering.

I don't know if you are reading this as a recruiting manager, recruiter, engineer on the market, or just an average dude who is thinking, "Good god, I've reached the end of the Internet." If you're a recruiting manager, I hope this encourages you to embrace the naturally emerging style of the recruiters on your team. If you're a recruiter, I say, ditch the script and figure out what kind of food you are. If you're an engineer on the market, I hope this encourages you to look for a recruiter you actually like. If you're an average dude or dudette, and you've made it to the end of this post, you're clearly interested in recruiting and I probably want to hire you, so you should probably email me.